No. 57: Indianapolis Colts

Ultimate Standings 2012

Updated: September 7, 2012, 11:03 AM ET
By Eddie Matz | ESPN The Magazine

Last year's rank: 14
Title track: 15
Ownership: 76
Coaching: 89
Players: 27
Fan relations: 19
Affordability: 55
Stadium experience: 11
Bang for the buck: 121

For certain franchises, a place in the top half of our rankings would be cause for celebration (looking at you, Wizards, Bengals and Leafs). For the Colts? Not so much. After finishing in the top 15 each of the last seven years -- including 2008, when they were numero uno -- Indy slipped 43 notches (the NFL's biggest tumble) to its lowest grade ever. If you're searching for the culprit, look no further than bang for the buck, where the Steeds stumbled a full hundred spots (the largest bang belly flop of any club) thanks to fans who resented paying the league's seventh-highest ticket prices ($85.34 on average) to watch an under-Mann-ed squad that tied for the worst record in football (2-14). If you do the math, you'll find that Colts clappers paid a league-high $341 per win last season. By comparison, the Packers' pride paid just 40 bucks per W. Despite a roster that features just six holdovers from the squad that won Super Bowl XLI and no longer includes familiar names like Peyton, Saturday, Clark and Brackett, loyalists at the luxurious Luke still give the roster plenty of love (players: 27) thanks to lifers like Reggie Wayne (third among active receivers in receptions and yards) and long-snapper Justin Snow (hasn't missed a game in 12 years). Of course, a little bit of Luck doesn't hurt either.