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"Break 'em up!"
Detroit Tigers:
OK, this is getting unnerving: The Tigers moved to
3-0, their first three-game win streak to open a season in 19 years. They open at home today.
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The Lead Item
Two Words For You:
HOOTIE. BLOWHARD.
New year for the Masters, same old
Hootie, preening like an extra from "Dukes of
Hazzard":
What he said:
"I really think that the American public is ready for
us to talk about golf."
What he meant:
"If you ask me one more time about Martha Burk, I'll
stick this 9-iron... and have you seen our lovely new
pine trees near the 11th fairway?"
What he said II:
"We'd be pleased to have Michelle [Wie] play in the
Masters tournament... if she qualifies."
What he meant:
"Urp..."
And if the Masters comes up at work, and you're
pressed for your own Hootie-quality analysis, these
will get you by:
"How about that Arnie Palmer?"
or
"Tiger's due for a rebound."
Clemens vs. Bonds
The first at-bat had all the drama of
an intentional walk (uh, it was an intentional
walk).
The second at-bat was filled with tension, but
ended on a sketchy called third strike. Age before
beauty, apparently.
The third at-bat was worth waiting for. How
refreshing to see a pitcher go right at Bonds.
Rocket's reward? Another Bonds K.
G-Men/Bolts Trade?
Figuring that drafting a future All-Pro left
tackle can't possibly help them more than the
buzz of selecting an overrated QB with the "Manning"
pedigree, the Giants seem ready to trade their No. 4
pick to the Chargers for the No. 1 overall
pick.
Then again, the last time the hapless Chargers traded
away a No. 1 pick used to select a QB, it was Michael
Vick. (But SD may be on to something: Eli Manning
isn't that much better than "next-best" Ben
Roethlisberger or Quickie fave Philip Rivers. He
certainly ain't no Vick.)
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CHECK OUT THE QUICKIE EVERY WEEKDAY MORNING! |
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| WHO'S GOT THE MOMENTUM ... |
Grizzlies: Hit 50 Ws; Hubie as Coach of the Year is a lock
John Thompson III: "Son of JTII" lead candidate at G'town
Decline of MLB player salaries: Down 3 percent, a miracle!
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| ... AND WHO'S GOT NO MO' |
Cleve. Browns: CEO Policy stepping down; team rudderless?
Raptors: Mathematically eliminated from NBA playoff race
Padres: Drop to 1-2; what happened to the Opening Day mo'? |
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NHL Playoffs
Here's a solution for the fan-depleted NHL:
Just skip the regular season and go right to the
playoffs. (Wait: You say that's going to happen next
season anyway? Nevermind ...)
To casual NHL fans, it's all about finding this
season's "Jiggy" -- that previously anonymous goalie
who can get hot and carry his team through the Stanley
Cup finals.
Three made their first career playoff starts last
night, with three Ws to show for it:
Leggy? Detroit's Legace
Aebby? Colorado's Aebischer
Ray-Ray? Boston's Raycroft
But that's just one game: It takes at least a
series for fans to get really Jiggy.
MLB Wrap
Angels: Best 1-2 punch?
Vlad Guerrero (HR) is great; Garret Anderson (2 HR) is
even better ...
It's a mock-free zone!
No more poking fun at Ken Gimpy Jr. after his
first-at-bat HR to lead the Reds past the
Cubs ...
Where's the run support?
Every time A's ace Barry Zito takes one of those 2-1
losses, he probably thinks the Yankees look better and
better ...
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NBA Playoff Field
The day after the 37-42 Knicks clinched
the East's seventh playoff spot, it's worth noting
again how ludicrous it is that East playoff
field is flush with dreck, yet two of three
41-37 teams fighting for the West's 8th spot (DEN,
POR, Utah) will head to the lottery.
The NBA wants a global game? Let's start with a
"global" playoff field -- open the playoffs to the top
16 teams, regardless of league.
Yankees on Trial
Break Up the Bombers? The
Yankees go on trial tonight (7 p.m. ET, ESPN), for
alleged crimes of excess.
Now that "Juror No. 4" from the Tyco (mis)trial
has some time on her hands, maybe the Yankees can pack
her onto the jury for a sure-fire "not guilty." Tyco's
lavish spending made the Yankees look thrifty.
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Twins rookie C
Joe Mauer:
Highly touted (perhaps even "uber-") rookie will sit
for a month after tearing something in his left knee
that young catchers shouldn't tear.
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Today on ESPN.com
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| Page 2: The underrappreciated great one |
| Baseball's mystery men |
| NFL Draft: Rating the RBs |
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| Arguments for why/why not Yankees are good for baseball |  Great
| Engages full range of fans
|  Good
| MLB needs a good NY team
|  Necessary evil
| Rising tide lifts all boats
|  Bad
| Price teams out of f.a. market
|  Pure evil
| | Win only because of cash flow |
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David Stern insists that MJ will be an NBA owner
someday (Hello: Phoenix???) Yes, but will he let him
relocate to Vegas?...
All aboard? 2003 phenom Dontrelle Willis makes his
first start as a sophomore today at home vs. the
Expos...
Tonight's Stanley Cup playoffs: StL/SJ (10, ESPN);
NYI/TB; NJ/PHI; and OTT/TOR, the other half of the
Canada Rules! matchups (CAL/VAN) the other...
Between the volume of preps and Euros expected to head
to the NBA draft, all but a handful of college players
would be insane to come out early. UCLA's Dijon
Thompson? What is he thinking?...
With March Madness already a fading memory, we're
heading into the sports year's third season: MLB,
Masters, NBA/NHL p'offs...
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