April 9, 2004
Jessica Simpson:
It's her world: Between Thursday's "Apprentice" mention, Sunday's new "variety" show and No. 1 status on Maxim's Hot List ... Overexposed? Hmm ...
 
 
 
The Lead Item
Two Words For You:
GENERATION.  TIGER.

Call them "Generation Tiger."

23-year-old PGA studs like TPC winner Adam Scott -- and Masters Thursday leader Justin Rose -- hit their late-teens developmental curve with Tiger as the aspiration, the "I am Tiger Woods" effect.

Meanwhile, there was the "I hate Tiger Woods" effect: Existing PGA players were surprised by Tiger's dominance, then freaked out, and now are just finally showing signs of getting over it.

But with Tiger as the idol -- rather than the neurosis -- players like Scott and Rose emulate Tiger's early fearlessness.

Just one pop theory to explain the success of the young players.

Tiger's Rue
"I'm done today. Thanks."

How many different ways can Tiger's quote be parsed?

(1) Literally: He has nothing to say to the Tiger-obsessed media.

(2) Metaphorically: He was thankful that he was done for the day, after such a brutal start.

(3) Philosophically: His woeful front nine obliterated his chances for the entire tournament.

Tigers Rule
Four-and-Freakin'-Oh. Detroit leads the AL in batting and is in the top three in pitching. Yes, Mr. Buzzkill, it's only been four games, but do yourself a therapeutic favor and enjoy the unpredictability.

NBA West: First
Jockeying for first: T'wolves beat the Kings last night to take a one-game lead with only a handful to play:

MIN (3): @GS, Utah, @Mem
SAC (4): @Phx, LAL, @Den, @GS

CHECK OUT THE QUICKIE EVERY WEEKDAY MORNING!
WHO'S GOT THE MOMENTUM ...
Frozen Four: Denver vs. Maine in college hockey title game
Angels: Impressive 3-game sweep of Mariners in Seattle
Spider-Man 2: See the trailer's premiere last night? Whew!
... AND WHO'S GOT NO MO'
NJ Devils: Defending NHL champs stymied by scrappy Philly
Gene Keady: Purdue hires his successor to be his assistant
Amy/Nick: Apprentice couple fired together; TV nups next?
 
Then again, for this to mean anything, the T'wolves would have to make it to the conference finals; let's see 'em win a playoff series first.

More NBA West
Jockeying in the middle: Mavs, Griz knotted up for fifth place. Fifth plays the Spurs; 6th plays the Lakers. Kind of a "damned-do/damned-don't" thing, isn't it?

Jockeying for 8th: Utah slipped behind idle Denver and Portland. Shame two won't make the cut.

Dontrelle Mania
D-Train shows no sign of slowing down as a soph: Not just the impressive season-opening W (8 K, 5 H, 8 IP) or even the 3/3 hitting; it was that telegenic headfirst slide while running the bases. This is why fans love him, and I think he must know it.

Maxim Hot 100
As mentioned earlier, it's Jessica Simpson's world, and we're just languishing in it.

Aside from the upcoming TV Variety Hour (with hubby Nick), guaranteed to be 100 percent irony-free, there's this No. 1 ranking on Maxim's Hot 100 List.

What a bandwagon pick: Aside from Simpson, who makes Trista Rehn look demure, and inspired No. 6 pick Mischa Barton, the list reads like the same one from the past three years. (See Big 5, right.)

A simple question for the list-makers: Elisha Cuthbert not in the Top 10? Have they not seen those "Girl Next Door" ads?

NFL's "Workplace
Diversity" Committee:

Definition of irony: The "workplace diversity" group rejected extending "Rooney Rule" of hiring opportunity from coaches to the front office.
 
 
Today on ESPN.com
Page 2: Simmons in Vegas
NFL Draft coverage
IN: NBA-ready seniors
 
Most Overrated Maxim Top 10 Hotties
Paris Hilton (No. 8)
Rich, porn don't a hottie make
 
Jennifer Lopez (5)
Maybe in '01, but not anymore
 
Anna K (4)
Even eclipsed in her own sport
 
Christina Aguilera (3)
Depends: Plus-size or old model?
 
Rebecca Romjin-Stamos (7)
Seen her up close; not a Top 10er
 

Not guilty! Yankees acquitted of being bad for baseball, 10-2. Maybe THAT'S why the Boss was crying in a local TV interview ...

Rumors of a new three-year deal for Torre are floating; must be offering him a ton to take *3* more years of Bosstability ...

Hank Aaron won't get caught up in Bonds hysteria. Says he wishes BB luck, but won't travel when/if (no, it's "when") BB hits 756 ...

Baby Bulls ruined it for everyone else: NBAPA VP Antonio Davis said his experience with Chandler, Curry convinced him of minimum age requirement ...

Peter Bogdanovich (you know him as Dr. Melfi's own shrink on "Sopranos") will direct ESPN's Pete Rose movie ...



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