Commentary

Testing Stanford's student-athletes list

Originally Published: March 10, 2011
By Patrick Hruby | Page 2

According to reports, Stanford has stopped distributing a list of "courses of interest" -- widely regarded as an "Easy A" list -- to its student-athletes in the wake of an investigative report.

Talk about a knee-jerk overreaction.

Look, Page 2 would never endorse Rocks for Jocks 101. After all, we're a bastion of literary prose and academic-style sports scholarship. A few of us even have our GED's.

That said, we think Stanford is being unfair. Because those "courses of interest" aren't easy. They're hard.

The proof? Page 2's dubious network of sources has obtained final exam questions from many of the courses on the actual Stanford list.

Take a look:


ECON 1A -- Elementary Economics

1. Which of the following coins are you LEAST likely to find in a "take a penny, leave a penny" tray? (Check all that apply)

(a) Dime

(b) Quarter

(c) Casino poker chip

(d) Philippine Peso


2. If Joe America has two cups of sugar but needs four to bake an aircraft carrier-shaped cake, then how many cups of sugar does he need to borrow from his Chinese neighbor?



ATHLETIC 187 -- Analysis of Human Movement

1. Closing the fingers in one's hand creates a:

(a) Hug

(b) Blink

(c) Fist

(d) Goldfish


2. Which of the following body parts is NOT involved in running?

(a) Feet

(b) Knees

(c) Legs

(d) Tail



COMM 1B -- Media, Culture and Society

1. Nixon : Frost

(a) Cruise : Winfrey

(b) Spears : Lauer

(c) Sheen : Ustream

(d) All of the above


2. Spell "TMZ": ________________



DANCE 156 -- Social Dances of North America III

1. The "Dougie" is named after:

(a) Fred Astaire

(b) Twyla Tharp

(c) Mark Madsen

(d) Doug E. Fresh


2. Which of the following was a sequel to the 1984 dance film "Breakin'"?

(a) "Dirty Dancing"

(b) "Lambada: The Forbidden Dance"

(c) "Blame it on the Macarena: Starring Charo"

(d) "Breakin' II: Electric Boogaloo"



HIST 106B -- Global Human Geography

1. Which of the following climates do humans live in? (Check all that apply)

(a) Tropical

(b) Temperate

(c) Arctic

(d) Lunar


2. Without using your laptop or smartphone's map function, identify the current location where you are sitting (+/- 20 miles):



ENGLISH 160 -- Poetry and Poetics

1. Complete the following sentence: Roses are ____.


2. How many roads are referred to in Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken?"

(a) Two

(b) A



POLISCI 2 -- Intro to American National Government

1. The three branches of government are:

(a) Executive, Legislative, Judicial

(b) Pepperoni, Sausage, Mushrooms

(c) Nina, Pinta, Santa Maria

(d) Tony, Toni, Tone!


2. What shape is the President's office?

(a) Octagon

(b) Rhombus

(c) Trapezoid

(d) None of the above



CS 547 -- Human Computer Interaction Seminar

1. Current artificial intelligence remains incapable of:

(a) Playing chess

(b) Facial recognition

(c) Playing "Jeopardy!"

(d) Knowing now why humans cry


2. In 500 words or less, describe the functional utility of the "Ask Madden" button:



MED 207 -- History of Medicine

1. Which of the following is currently used in hospitals?

(a) Leeches

(b) Trepanning

(c) Penicillin

(d) Sorcery


2. Who replaced George Clooney on "ER?"

(a) Goran Visnjic

(b) John Stamos

(c) Patrick Dempsey

(d) Trick question, nobody could ever replace dreamy Dr. Ross



PSYC 135 -- Sleep and Dreams

1. Which of the following is LEAST conducive to dreaming?

(a) Pillow

(b) Blanket

(c) Warm milk

(d) Nearby sidewalk removal


2. EXTRA CREDIT: Place your head on your desk. Close your eyes. Report your findings at the end of the semester.

Patrick Hruby is a freelance writer and ESPN.com contributor. Contact him at PatrickHruby.net.


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