"It's Opening Day! It's Opening Day! It's Opening Day! Red Sox-A's are on! Red Sox-A's are on!"

I just got done running up and down the street yelling that like a baseball fan version of Paul Revere. You probably didn't hear it because the odds are pretty slim that I'm your neighbor. Oh, and one more thing -- it's still pitch black here on the East Coast.

Don't worry, you can go ahead and hit the snooze button. From the first pitch to the last out, Page 2 has you covered with everything you need to know about the 2008 season opener.

FIRST INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Didn't you hear? It's Opening Day! If you can't get excited for this, our condolences to your family and friends -- because you're dead.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: If you drafted Daisuke Matsuzaka for your fantasy team, you probably don't want to see his third pitch of the season (spoiler alert: it was a home run to Mark Ellis). Or the walk he followed it up with. Or how he managed to follow that by hitting Jack Cust in the foot. Or the wild pitch after that. Or the walk after that. Or the RBI groundout to Bobby Crosby, who's hitting .228 for the past two years, as play-by-play man Gary Thorne reminded everyone. A 32-pitch effort in the end. Welcome home, Daisuke.

What I Wish I Saw: A rousing pregame performance of Styx singing Mr. Roboto.

Highlight/Lowlight: How is J.D. Drew going to answer his critics this season about his being easily injured? By informing Terry Francona right before the lineup cards were exchanged that his back was bothering him and he wouldn't be able to play.

Grade:
You're going to hear it one more time -- it's Opening Day. That alone warrants the 10 spot.

SECOND INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Travis Buck's hair majestic plumage in high-def. He's about an inch and a half away from being the Fabio of baseball.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: The $143 million Red Sox delivering two leadoff hits, and that's about it. The $79 million A's are at least keeping us awake.

What I Wish I Saw: Clips of Daisuke's 270-pitch game in high school. Sit tight, we might see a repeat performance by the fourth inning.

Highlight/Lowlight: Apparently Jack Cust's game strategy is this: "Wait until I get hit in the foot." Strikeout looking.

Grade:
No runs, couple of walks, a bunch of pitches in the dirt. Does Dunkin' Donuts deliver?

THIRD INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Dustin Pedroia has a hit. Jacoby Ellsbury struck out looking. Dustin has the lead, but it's still early, America. The question of "Who's more scrappy?" will have to be answered a little later.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: Based on everything we're hearing from announcers Gary Thorne and Steve Phillips, they should just show the Japanese high school national championships and update this game on the ticker.

What I Wish I Saw: Someone mistaking Bobby Crosby for a movie star, because he isn't going to be mistaken for a major league hitter any time soon.

Highlight/Lowlight: The larger-than-life Big Papi follows his first-pitch pop out by falling victim to the shift and stranding two men on base.

Grade:
Tom Emanski would be proud of you, Julio Lugo.

FOURTH INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Commissioner Bud Selig showing his respect for Japan and its fans by speaking fluent Japanese in the booth. Wait, that was English?

Should Have Stayed In Bed: Manny Ramirez and Mike Lowell currently lead the majors in "pop outs that make the fans temporarily ooh and aah."

What I Wish I Saw: Manny address the crowd and invite everyone to his house for free drinks.

Highlight/Lowlight: "I'd do it again in a heartbeat." -- Bud Selig on whether or not he would commission the Mitchell report, knowing what he knows now.

Grade:
Good to see Daisuke settling in just in time to hit the 80-pitch mark.

FIFTH INNING
Worth Getting Up For: While all eyes are on national icon Matsuzaka, Joe Blanton is quietly throwing this line: 5 IP, 2 H, 0 R (Joe is making about $500,000, by the way).

Should Have Stayed In Bed: Bud Selig staying in the booth for another inning, singing "I Will Always Love You" and dedicating it to Sen. Mitchell. (I may or may not have fallen asleep and dreamt that.)

What I Wish I Saw: NESN analyst Jerry Remy playing air guitar ... and, well, just see for yourself.

Highlight/Lowlight: The legend of Daisuke apparently showed up. He finishes the inning by retiring his seventh straight batter.

Grade:
Why seven? Why not? Hey, you're the one still sleeping.

SIXTH INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Pedroia has a double (courtesy of a Buck mini-gaffe in center). But who's that sliding home to tie the game? It's Kevin Youkilis! Who's giving the Sox the lead? It's Brandon Moss! Hold on ... Jack Hannahan gets the lead back for the A's with a two-run shot off Kyle Snyder! This whole "scrappiest" question might never be answered.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: If you're wearing a Joe Blanton jersey and you're in a Boston bar this morning, all that trash talk is definitely coming back to haunt you. But if you're sitting next to a guy with a Kyle Snyder jersey, well, keep talking.

What I Wish I Saw: Former A's ace Barry Zito singing "Twist and Shout." Still better than what he's done for the Giants.

Highlight/Lowlight: Another "towering pop out" for Big Papi. Right now he's barely earning his $40,000 appearance fee.

Grade:
Hey, the world champs put some runs on the board, but decided to go with Snyder with a one-run lead. Interesting strategy, Tito.

SEVENTH INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Seeing Keith Foulke in the pen getting ready to come into the game for the A's. Does Red Sox Nation realize that guy basically threw the rest of his career away so they could end that curse of theirs?

Should Have Stayed In Bed: Jack Cust continues to use the "wait until I get hit in the foot" strategy. Definitely not scrappy.

What I Wish I Saw: Dustin Pedroia ripping his shirt off in an epic dance-off. If that's the body of a professional athlete, there's hope for all of us.

Highlight/Lowlight: Julio Lugo reminding us of the Red Sox 2007 season. Not the part when they won the World Series, but the part when Lugo hit into about 500 double plays. At least he didn't grab his crotch.

Grade:
You can't complain about a 4-3 game.

EIGHTH INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Keith Foulke gets a mini-redemption with the fans who booed him out of Boston by striking out Manny to end the inning. And this isn't just your usual Manny, this is contract year Manny.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: Big Papi and his pseudo-Pedro Martinez hair are currently tied with you for hits this season.

What I Wish I Saw: Former A's batboy MC Hammer's Too Legit To Quit video. Yes, that was Jose Canseco, Isiah Thomas, Kirby Puckett, Jerry Rice, Rickey Henderson, Andre Rison, Deion Sanders, Chris Mullin, Roger Clemens, Roger Craig, Ronnie Lott, David Robinson and Jerry Glanville you just saw.

Highlight/Lowlight: Jacoby Ellsbury's leaping catch in center ... the scrappiest scrapper that ever scrapped a scrap. Case closed.

Grade:

Bryan Corey looking eerily like Mariano Rivera (facial expressions only).

NINTH INNING
Worth Getting Up For: Sayonara and a tie game! J.D. Drew replacement Brandon Moss picked a great time to get his first major league homer.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: A's closer Huston Street (and his blown save) edges out Jason Varitek (and his three K's) as the player who should have thought about taking a sick day.

What I Wish I Saw: Hideki Okajima coming out of the bullpen to "Funky Okajima."

Highlight/Lowlight: We love Oki! Who's Daisuke? Of the two, the Japanese faithful definitely gave Okajima the warmer reception. Not 100 percent sure, but I counted at least 500 more flashbulbs.

Grade:
Ten bonsais! Any time you tie it up in the ninth, you get the 10 spot. Everyone knows that.

10TH INNING

Worth Getting Up For: Opening Day extra-inning game. Read that very slowly. Every one of those words is wicked awesome.

Should Have Stayed In Bed: A's manager Bob Geren overmanaging by going with the intentional walk to Ortiz (a very weak-looking 0-for-4 up to that point) to get to Manny. Sure, Manny was 0-for-4 with two K's versus Street in his career, but remember ... this is contract year Manny.

What I Wish I Saw: What every American wants ... an old-fashioned game of Jedi Baseball.

Highlight/Lowlight: Emil Brown getting caught in a rundown after his RBI double, costing the A's what would have been the tying run when Bobby Crosby then singled. What does he care? He's just happy to be out of Pittsburgh and Kansas City. Let's just hope Jonathan Papelbon sends him a thank-you note.

Grade: 100 bonsais! No, 1,000! Baseball is back! Baseball is back! Scream it from the rooftops.

Mike Philbrick is an editor for Page 2. You can reach him at michael.w.philbrick@espn3.com.