The bottom line was that Cobain was slipping as a musician because of his personal problems; his songs were getting weirder and weirder; and if he had somehow managed to stay alive, he probably would have spent the next few years floating in and out of rehab centers and insane asylums. Since we don't know what would have happened next, we assume the best for him. Same goes for Lenny Bias – what if he had a drug problem but didn't die? What if he ended up like William Bedford or Chris Washburn, or even had one of those Bernard King-type careers and had to get traded a few times before he found himself? We don't know how it would have played out, so we assume he would have been fantastic. By dropping dead, he became immortal. Same with Cobain. Now Nirvana gets credited with launching an entire era of music that was already in place when they broke through. How does that make sense?
Q: The Antoine Walker column was the first good thing you've written since your wife took away your onions.
– Frank Verrelli, Providence
SG: Umm ... thank you.
Q: I used to think Ozzie Osbourne was a complete vegetable ... I just realized how good he really has it. He can just pretend he didn't hear or understand anything anyone ever said and get away with it. At any point, if he is not feeling what's going on in the room, he just gets up and leaves. How do you think Sports Gal would respond if anytime she asked you something you didn't like, you just shook your head and waddled out of the room?
– David, Miami, Fla.
SG: Who said that doesn't already happen?
Q: What's your take on the media comparing "Million Dollar Baby" to "Rocky"?
– Matt Graff, Ketchum, Idaho
SG: I think a better question would be, "Would you have liked 'Rocky' as much if Apollo sucker-punched him in their big fight, Stallone ended up a quadriplegic, and then Adrian pulled the plug on him and opened a coffee shop with Paulie?"
(And the answer, obviously, is no. That reminds me ...)
Q: Shouldn't it be a requirement that Hilary Swank make an acceptance speech every year for something, regardless of whether she is nominated for an Oscar, just for the sake of the UIC scale? "I'd like to thank the incomparable (insert actor she worked with that year) ... You ... you are ... my river ... from which all of this good fortune flows ... You are so beautiful. This is so ... splendiforous for me to be honored. I'm just a girl from a trailer park who had a dream and a part in 'The Next Karate Kid.' Thank you all. Wait! Hold on. Stop the music! I haven't thanked Mr. Miyagi yet ... "
– Nathan Holtslander, Appleton, Wis.
SG: Every time she gives those speeches, I keep waiting for her to say, "And finally, I'd like to thank Joe E. Tata, whose incomparable brilliance was such an inspiration to me on the set of '90210' ... "
Q: What is the grace period for thinking about Hilary Swank in a sexual way after "Boys Don't Cry"? Is it the same as for criticizing a team after it wins a title?
– Ryan Amari, Melrose, Mass.
