ESPN.com - Take the 2001 news quiz

ESPN.com: Page 2

Monday, December 31, 2001
Updated: January 2, 12:06 PM ET
Take the 2001 news quiz

By Jim Caple
Page 2

You may have the champagne on ice and the Humanitarian Bowl on TV, but are you really ready to ring in a new year? Not so fast. Remember, you can't graduate to 2002 until passing your final exam on the 2001 year in sports.

Math and science


	Plenty of weighty questions surround former Cowboy Nate Newton.

1. Which is the heaviest?
A. Cowboys tackle Aaron Gibson
B. The combined weight of Serena and Venus Williams
C. The combined weight of Destiny's Child
D. The combined weight of marijuana found in vans with former Cowboy Nate Newton

(ANSWER: D -- Newton was arrested on two occasions, once with 215 pounds of marijuana and then with 173 pounds of marijuana, for a total of 388 pounds, eight pounds more than Gibson weighs, about 50 pounds more than Beyonce Knowles, Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams of Destiny's Child and about 80 pounds more than the Williams' sisters.)

2. Story problem: If Nate Newton used two vans to transport 388 pounds of marijuana and a fully loaded Chevy Grand Caravan costs $44,000 and A's outfielder Jeremy Giambi was picked up in Las Vegas with about a half-ounce of marijuana the same day Jason Giambi signed a $120 million contract with the Yankees, how many pounds of Newton's stash could the Giambi brothers afford to haul to spring training?

(ANSWER: It's a trick question -- it all depends on whether Detective Olden Polynice is policing the border crossing.)

3. Arrange in order from highest to lowest
A. World Series champion Arizona Diamondbacks reported losses
B. Alleged offer for a naked photo of Ichiro
C. A-Rod's average annual salary
D. Reported losses for the XFL
E. Reward for Osama bin Laden

(ANSWER: D. XFL, $35 million; A. Diamondbacks, $32 million; C. A-Rod, $25.2 million; E. Osama, $25 million; B. Ichiro, $2 million.)

4. Which is the longest time span?


	Tom Green

A. Ichiro running from home-to-first
B. Randy Moss running 40 yards
C. Boris Becker's estimated time it took for him to have sex in a closet with the mother of his illegitimate child
D. Tom Green and Drew Barrymore's marriage

(ANSWER: B. Ichiro can go from home to first in 3.7 seconds and Becker claimed his sexual liaison lasted five seconds -- that's right, five seconds -- but it takes Moss far longer to cover 40 yards. It only takes him 4.2 seconds to actually run the distance, but first you have to get him motivated. And I'm not convinced Green and Barrymore ever even dated, let alone really got married.)

5. Arrange in order from lowest to highest


	Alex Rodriguez

A. Amount the NBA fined Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban
B. Average salary of public school teacher in United States
C. A-Rod's bonus for finishing sixth in the MVP vote
D. Amount the Vikings and the NFL fined Randy Moss
E. Value of jewelry Jalen Rose reported stolen from his locker
F. Cost of giant billboard near Times Square hyping (unsuccessfully) Oregon quarterback Joey Harrington for the Heisman Trophy

(ANSWER: B. schoolteacher, $42,800; D. Moss, $45,000; C. A-Rod bonus, $100,000; E. Rose's jewels, and Harrington's billboard, $250,000 each; A. Cuban, $460,000.)

History and politics


	Danny Almonte did not lie on his résumé.

1. Match the lie with the person who listed it in his team's media guide:
A. Played strong safety two seasons at USC
B. Lettered three years at New Hampshire and earned a master's degree from NYU
C. Year of birth: 1989
D. "He purchased the team with a sense of community responsibility and a feeling that major league sports, particularly baseball, are vital to the standard of living any community must strive to achieve."

I. Coach George O'Leary
II. Danny Almonte
III. Outfielder Al Martin
IV. Twins owner Carl Pohlad

(ANSWER: A and III, B and I, C and II, D and IV)

2. What did President Bush not do:
A. Perform the coin flip that opened the NFL season
B. Throw out the first pitch to Game 3 of the World Series
C. Throw out a pitch at the Little League World Series
D. Drop the puck to begin the NHL season
E. Turn part of the White House lawn into a Little League field
F. Turn Afghanistan into a parking lot

(ANSWER: D. drop the puck)

3. Match the quote with the politician who said it.


	Jesse Ventura

A. "Did you ever see 'Caddyshack?' "
B. "I just see myself in a pot of boiling water with all these natives dancing around me."
C. "Our allies need to take a look at the Baltimore Ravens."
D. "I've been particularly impressed by your management of the Brewers because it's always a good weekend when the Brewers come to town."

I. President Bush discussing European defense policy
II. Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura's question to the Dalai Lama
III. New York Congressman Anthony Weiner mocking Bud Selig
IV. Toronto mayor Mel Lastman on why he didn't want to go to Kenya to lobby IOC officials during his city's bid for the 2008 Olympics

(ANSWER: A and II, B and IV, C and I, D and III.)

4. While appearing before Congress and under oath, how did Bud Selig answer questions regarding baseball's finances?


	Bud Selig

A. As truthfully as Enron's board of directors
B. As accurately as the calculations of Ian Woosnam's caddy
C. As reliably as the BCS computers
D. Vaguely or not at all

(ANSWER: E. All of the above)

5. As one of his final acts in office, Time's Person of the Year, New York Mayor Rudy Giuiliani, announced a tentative deal for what?
A. Building an $800 million retractable dome stadium to replace Yankee Stadium
B. Building an $800 million retractable dome stadium to replace Shea Stadium
C. A plan to somehow finance the estimated $34 billion cost to rebuild damage from the World Trade Center attacks

(ANSWER: Both A and B)

Arts and literature
1. Who did not perform at the Super Bowl?


	Hint: She covered Aerosmith better than Jason Sehorn covered Brandon Stokley.

A. Mary J. Blige
B. The Backstreet Boys
C. *N Sync
D. Aerosmith
E. Britney Spears
F. Whitney Houston
G. Sting
H. Bon Jovi
I. Styx
J. Ray Charles

(ANSWER: F. Houston -- though you could make a good case for the Giants offense, as well.)

2. Who was ejected from a Knicks game?
A. Jack Nicholson
B. Jimmy Buffett
C. Spike Lee
D. Billy Crystal
E. Patrick Ewing

(ANSWER: B. Buffett, while in Miami.)

3. Who did not have a New York Times bestseller this year?


	Don Zimmer

A. Don Zimmer
B. Yogi Berra
C. Seabiscuit
D. Doris Kearns Goodwin
E. Tiger Woods
F. Shaquille O'Neal
G. Bill Russell
H. Chyna

(ANSWER: D. Goodwin, though thankfully she still outranks all the others put together in Pulitzer Prizes)

4. Arrange these broadcasts in order from highest- to lowest-rated:
A. Pro Bowl
B. The episode of "Emeril" with special guest star Burt Reynolds
C. Men's Wimbledon final
D. Game 7 Stanley Cup finals
E. Week 7 XFL broadcast
F. British Open final round
G. U.S. Open women's final
H. NBA All-Star Game
I. "The Facts of Life Reunion" show

(ANSWER: I. "Facts of Life Reunion," 7.4 rating; G. U.S. Open, 6.8; A. Pro Bowl, 5.8; H. NBA All-Star Game, 5.1; B. Emeril, 4.8, F. British Open, 4.6; D. Stanley Cup, 4.2; C. Wimbledon, 2.5; E. XFL, 1.6 -- which is believed to be the lowest prime-time rating in history for a show that aired on one of the original three networks)

5. Name the performers from Game 1 of the NBA Finals who recorded the following lyrics:


	Iverson

A. "Everybody stay fly/get money kill and f--- b------/I'm hittin' anything in plain view for my riches."
B. "Can't get witcha/don't let the door hitcha/where the Lord splitcha."
C. "People know me on these streets playa/I ain't new/lookin' at me all funny while I'm countin' my money/surprise what I do is already legalized."
D. "Early morning, April 4/A shot rings out in the Memphis sky/Free at last, they took your life,/But they could not take your pride."

(ANSWER: A. Allen Iverson, "40 Bars"; B. Kobe Bryant, "K.O.B.E."; C. Shaq, "No Love Lost"; D. Bono, U2's "In the Name of Love")

Health and medicine
1. Which of the following were actual sports injuries?
A. San Diego pitcher Adam Eaton stabbed himself while trying to open a DVD package
B. San Diego first baseman Ryan Klesko injured his back helping unfurl a giant U.S. flag on the field in a Sept. 11 tribute
C. Texas running backs coach Bruce Chambers blew out an Achilles tendon jumping up and down in a postgame celebration
D. Argentine striker Martin Palermo broke his leg in two places when a wall collapsed on him while celebrating a goal
E. Pittsburgh Steelers fullback Dan Kreider strained a hamstring walking down the hallway of the team dormitory F. Peterborough United striker Francis Green strained his back lifting a bag of groceries

(ANSWER: All of the above.)

2. Sevilla soccer player Francisco Gallardo celebrated a goal by biting his teammate's:
A. Forehead
B. Elbow
C. Genitals
D. Knee

(ANSWER: C. Genitals -- and no, I don't know why, either)


	PETA and the Yankees found a common enemy in Randy Johnson.

3. Randy Johnson's fastball killed:
A. A pigeon flying in front of home plate at the wrong time
B. The Yankees' World Series hopes

(ANSWER: A and B)

4. Arrange in chronological order the following events in Rae Carruth's life, as described in court testimony and prison interviews during 2001:
A. Met and had sex with the future mother of his child
B. Attended a Lamaze class with her
C. Learned her last name
D. Arranged for her murder

(ANSWER: Sadly, they already are in the correct order)

5. What was the worst thing about the Anna Kournikova virus?


	Anna Kournikova

A. It destroyed your computer's hard drive
B. It spread itself to everyone in your personal folder
C. It kept returning every time you deleted it from your system
D. You didn't acquire it the way in which you had probably fantasized

(ANSWER: B and D)

Jim Caple is a senior writer for Page 2.