Thursday, January 17, 2002
Updated: January 22, 11:24 AM ET
Look into my eyes
From the Page 2 mailbag
It's tough to cope with a loss in the NFL playoffs, but San Francisco 49ers coach Steve Mariucci took it especially hard after being knocked out by the Packers.
Page 2 couldn't figure out if Mooch was trying to perform a Vulcan mind meld or what the heck he was doing, so we asked for your help with this week's Mystery Photo.
We received more than 800 responses, and the best caption suggestions are below:
"The fans will have a field day with this. Especially since I just watched 'American Pie 2.' I just can't believe I super-glued myself to myself. Crap!"
Ken Williams
Sweetwater, Tenn.
"Let Ms. Cleo tell your future! Ah! Looks like trouble be brewing in Lambeau. Right, honey?"
Benjamin Bird
Los Angeles
"Finkle and Einhorn, in it together, but how? Come on, think! Finkle, Einhorn ... Einhorn, Finkle ..."
Arturo Rosales
Hermosa Beach, Calif.
Steve Mariucci finally understood what his mom meant when she told him his face was gonna get stuck like that after coaching Terrell Owens that long.
Michael Burleson
White Hall, Ark.
When asked what he was going to do during the offseason, Mariucci replied "We'll I'm auditioning for a remake of 'Scanners' this week. I think I've got a shot at it too. Check this out!"
Chris Perry
Arlington, Mass.
Steve Mariucci contemplates his future after being turned down for the managerial position at the San Franciso Dairy Queen.
Bryan Fydryck
Chicago
"So Terrell, when you look over at the sidelines and you see me doing this, that means quit dancing, shut the heck up and just catch the ball!"
Tekoa Joe
Lynchburg, Va.
"I see dead people."
Chaka Perry
Flint, Mich.
"If I concentrate hard enough, maybe Brett Favre's head will explode!"
Michael Manning
Notre Dame, Ind.
"Green Bay Packers ... Terrell Owens ... salary cap ... things I would like to see burn in hell.
William Li
Fremont, Calif.
"Terrell, look into my eyes ... you are getting very sleepy ... you are under my command ... you will stop being the biggest jackass in sports ..."
Dave Geeting
St. Louis
"Yes ... I could play an evil Tom Hanks, see?
Dan R
Colorado Springs, Colo.
"So then I tried the Jedi Mind Trick on Brett Favre, but that didn't work ..."
John Edwards
Hamilton, Ontario
"Mike Sherman, I am talking to you. Cut Brett Favre, cut Brett Favre, cut Brett Favre ..."
Steve
Raleigh, N.C.
Pushing back the skin on his forehead, Steve Mariucci tries to see what he will look like after he visits Jerry Jones' plastic surgeon in the offseason.
Kirby Whalen
Avon, Conn.
"Well, Regis, I'd like to use a lifeline."
Mike
Houston
Thinking: "Mom always said if you're nervous and flustered speaking in front of a group, try to picture them in their underwear ... picture them in their underwear ... picture them ... oh, God, these are reporters?"
Craig Ostroff
Ambler, Pa.
Trying to make a bad situation better, Steve tries to do a imitation of the Classic Robin Williams character of Mork from "Mork and Mindy," hoping that Jonathan Winters can help him out ...
Craig
Lowell, Mass.
Next week on Dr. Demento ...
Daniel Lilavois
Dover, N.H.
"How does The Rock get his eyebrow to raise that high?"
Andy Huggins
Phoenix
Knowing the word had been overused this season, Steve Mariucci wracks his brain for a synonym for "diddly-poo."
Ben O.
Boston
"Look into my eyes and you shall be hypnotized to forget about the horrible sweater I am wearing ..."
Steve Katayama
San Jose, Calif.
They knew coach Mariucci had snapped when he went into "Joan Crawford" mode, refusing to answer any questions until the reporters called him "Moochie Dearest."
Bill Keys
Gray, Tenn.
Mariucci, realizing he's the only prominent sports figure yet to be featured in Page 2's "Here's Looking at You" section, does his best Darth Maul impersonation, hoping someone will take notice.
Steve Shaffer
Winter Garden, Fla.
"The reason we lost to Green Bay? Gee, I dunno, let me see if I can put my finger on it."
John Grocke
Deltona, Fla.
"Right now, I'm going to read Terrell Owens' mind ... OK, that takes care of those three seconds, where was I?"
Ray Anselmo
Stockton, Calif.
"The Horror, The Horror ..."
Kelli Heard
Marietta, Ga.
What will Rachel do when she finds out Joey is in love with her?
Chris Voss
Michigan
"Serenity Now ... Serenity Now ..."
Patrick Saunders
Atlanta
And here is the real caption from The Associated Press: San Francisco 49ers coach Steve Mariucci listens to a question about Sunday's playoff loss to the Green Bay Packers, during a news conference Monday, Jan. 14 at 49ers headquarters in Santa Clara, Calif. (AP Photo/Paul Sakuma)
