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Monday, September 16, 2002
TV on the rise this fall

By Eric Immerman
Special to Page 2

Autumn is just around the corner, and that means it's almost time for Hollywood to debut its new batch of television programs. Page 2 is here to provide you with plot summaries and previews for some of the most highly anticipated new shows this fall.

New programs


	Rafael Palmeiro could give the WB a breakout hit with "Everwood."

"Life With Bonnie" (ABC)
Single mom Bonnie Blair appears to have it all: a burgeoning career, a precocious daughter, powerful, sculpted thighs, and a closet full of aerodynamic jumpsuits. However, she is on "thin ice" with her incessantly nagging mother who constantly tries to fix her up with an endless stream of losers. All seems lost ... until Bonnie meets "Mr. Wonderful," Paul Orndorff.

"Everwood" (WB)
Utilizing the innovative real-time format pioneered by Fox's "24," this new drama series traces the longest and hardest day of Rafael Palmeiro's life, beginning with his mysterious ingestion of a highly potent "little blue pill." Co-starring his aptly named sidekick, "Pudge."

"Girls Club" (Fox)
Emmy-winning writer/producer David E. Kelley brings us this musical "dramedy" about a trio of female attorneys -- portrayed in conservative pantsuits by NCWO Chairwoman Martha Burk, USA Today's Christine Brennan, and tennis great Billy Jean King -- who defend Title IX sanctions by day and perform in an Alanis Morissette cover band by night.

"Dinotopia" (ABC)
Through a bizarre set of circumstances, Dino Ciccarelli is transported to a utopian landscape (Sarnia, Ontario), where there is a boundless supply of Barenaked Ladies bootlegs, and where Lord Stanley's Cup runneth over with the sweet nectar of Labatt's Blue. Each episode, Dino's utopian existence is threatened by a ruthless, diabolical, and faceless man, only recognizable by his trademark hockey mullet. Ciccarelli ends each episode with the triumphant catch phrase, "Whose driving the Zamboni now, eh?"


	David Wells lays down the law in "Boomtown."

"Boomtown" (NBC)
Think "Cop Rock," but with police officers being played by Boomer Esiason, David "Boomer" Wells and Chris "Boomer" Berman, with all of them shouldering ghetto blasters in lieu of guns.

"Survivor: Thailand" (CBS)
The fifth installment of this reality series juggernaut finds the castaways traveling to exotic Thailand, where they'll engage in several immunity challenges, such as competing against local children to see who can manufacture the most Air Jordans in an hour under inhumane working conditions.

"Good Morning, Miami" (NBC)
Hamstrung by budget constraints that cost them the broadcasting rights to Major League Baseball, the National Basketball Association and the National Football League, NBC Sports presents this new studio show covering the exhilarating world of Jai Alai, with Marv Albert as your host.

"Push, Nevada" (ABC)
Life is out of whack in the WAC (Western Athletic Conference), as every single wager made on University of Nevada football games inexplicably results in a push. Intrepid oddsmaker Danny Sheridan investigates.


	Fox is betting that Cedric Ceballos will be able to entertain an audience blindfolded.

"Cedric The Entertainer" (Fox)
Take a voyeuristic journey inside the palatial estate of Cedric Ceballos as he "entertains" his houseguests at delightful dinner parties each week. In the pilot episode, Cedric, long since known as the Martha Stewart of small forwards, shares his homemade hummus recipe, demonstrates the proper etiquette for preparing fondue, leads the group in a rousing, spirited game of Scategories, and ends the evening by distributing personalized collages. Oh, did we mention that he does all this blindfolded!

"Greetings From Tucson" (WB)
Venerable documentary filmmaker Ken Burns produces the season's most talked about reality show, where actor Robert Wuhl reads a collection of actual letters written by athletes while staying at Arizona's Sierra Tucson luxurious substance abuse rehab facility.

Returning programs
"Curb Your Enthusiasm" (HBO)
Bud Selig stars as a man capable of putting a damper on even the most festive occasion. The new season opens with Selig searching for a way to "contract" fan goodwill after the thrilling 2001 World Series.


	"Dharma and Greg" wasn't able to hang around for the new season.

"Whose Line Is It Anyway?" (ABC)
This improvisational variety show, with Nate Newton serving as host from his studio in cellblock D, follows contestants as they perform a number of zany sketches while under the influence of illicit narcotics. The contestant who accumulates the most points gets to perform a raucous freebase with Newton at the end of the program. You never know what's going to be said or snorted on ? "Whose Line Is It Anyway?"

Canceled programs
"Dharma and Greg" (ABC)
When Greg Ostertag, an underachieving basketball player with a passion for Brooks & Dunn, falls for Dharma, a free-spirited young woman with a penchant for yoga, high jinks ensue. Their love grows everyday, but their families, hers eclectic, his old-fashioned, despise each other. (Karl Malone has a recurring role as Greg's most disapproving in-law)

Eric Immerman is a contributing comedy writer to ESPN The Magazine and "The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn." His material also has been featured on Laugh.com. He can be reached at eimmerman@hotmail.com