ESPN.com - Who's Biggest Nut Job in Pop Culture?

ESPN.com: Page 2

Tuesday, February 18, 2003
Who's Biggest Nut Job in Pop Culture?

By Gino Bona
Special to Page 2

Gatorade launched its brilliant "Be Like Mike" advertising campaign 12 years ago, and it had millions of Americans singing the same tune. We wanted Michael Jordan's good looks, his guaranteed contract, his sick vertical leap.

But as MJ spends another new day as a 40-something, two other famous people -- who happen to share Jordan's first name -- are going toe-to-toe for the undisputed title of "Biggest Nut Job in Pop Culture."

We're talking about Michael Jackson and Mike Tyson. While these celebrities couldn't be further opposites on the exterior, their careers have shared a common pattern over the past 20 years. Both Tyson and Jackson reached the pinnacle of their popularity in the '80s, plummeted into dire times in the '90s, and have spent the first couple years of the new millennium as undeniable weirdos.

Of course, both have had their share of controversy, too. Tyson is on the verge of snapping like a Slim Jim during every fight and interview. Meanwhile, the word "allegedly" hangs over Jackson's head like an umbrella on a sunny day.

These days, the catchy chorus of "Be Like Mike" should carry a parental warning.

So which one deserves the title of "Biggest Nut Job in Pop Culture". Check out the list below and cast your vote in the poll at right.

JACKO VS. IRON MIKE
Category	Michael Jackson	Mike Tyson
Nickname	"King of Pop"	"King of Pain"
Trademark move	Moonwalk	Profanity-laced tantrums
Net worth	Depends on who you ask	Ask Robin Givens
Career highlight	"Thriller"	"Thrilling 91-second thumping of Michael Spinks"
How they describe themselves	"I'm Peter Pan"	"I'm Sonny Liston"
Comfort food	Snow cones	Ears
Was teased as a child for ...	Having a huge nose	Talking like Cindy Brady
Is teased as an adult for ...	Acting like a child	Are you crazy!?! We're not teasing Mike.
Current foe	Martin Bashir	The flu (according to his promoter)
Likes to throw	Water balloons	Right hooks
Facial adjustments	Nose hanging by a thread	African tribal tattoo
What he has in common with normal people	Lies about how much money he has	Hasn't been to the gym in a while
What he's looking forward to	Fox airing "Michael Jackson Take 2: The Interview They Wouldn't Show You."	Fox airing "Michael Jackson Take 2: The Interview They Wouldn't Show You." Aren't we all?
Favorite pet	12-year-old Gavin	Those damn pigeons
Memphis connection	Married Elvis Presley's daughter	Only place that lets him box
Reckless behavior	Playing "Dangle Doddle Dandy" over hotel balconies	Live press conferences
What they wish they could borrow from each other	Tyson's enviable falsetto	Prince Michael II's chiffon scarf to cover up the new ink
Favorite activity with children	Wants to share his bed with 'em	Wants to eat 'em
Worst beating	From Dad after messing up dance routine	(Tie) Buster Douglas, Evander Holyfield, Lennox Lewis
Authority figure who didn't do quite enough	Liz Taylor	Cus D'Amato
Las Vegas craving	Bizarro shopping sprees	The Nevada State Athletic Commission to reconsider
Startling transformation	From black man to white hermaphrodite	From the youngest heavyweight champ to America's 2nd-most beloved cannibal
It's a shame that	Macauley Culkin's too old now	Tonya Harding's pro debut will be delayed
Career low point	Stay tuned	Ditto

Gino Bona continually strives for rock bottom on his "Wink & The Gun" site, which can be reached at www.winkandthegun.com. E-mail him at gino@winkandthegun.com.