Thursday, April 7, 2005
What was Big Mac thinking?
Page 2 staff
What the heck was Mark McGwire thinking when he repeatedly told a congressional hearing on steroid abuse in baseball: "I'm not here to talk about the past."
"I swear to tell ... absolutely nothing."
A. "I only want to talk about my future my miserable, tainted future."
B. "I'm not here to talk about the past, but I AM here to kick the crap out of Canseco."
C. "I'm not here to talk about the past, but I AM here to sniffle like a weenie."
D. "This is the last time I hire an attorney who went to law school in Guadalajara."
E. "Unless you mean the guilty-sounding responses of my extremely recent past, because I AM here to repeat those."
F. "Forget about anything I might have to say. I just pray poor Sammy can somehow regain his command of English that he seems to have tragically lost."