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|Lost in translation ... the fact that Dice bought this coat from The Denise Collection at Macy's.|
Here's what you missed this week from the Sports Guy:
• Don't question The Answer
Bill Simmons would like to congratulate the team that gets Allen Iverson because it just landed a once-in-a-lifetime superstar.
• The Answer II: The readers speak
With Allen Iverson packing his bags, the A.I. fans of the world have a few thoughts.
• Beat The Sports Guy
Week 15: Bengals at Colts
|Taking a charge for Sir Charles is the health equivalent of smoking three million packs of cigarettes.|
|If you don't think Autumn is putting "The OC" back on the map, well then you didn't see the previews last night.|
|Now everyone gets Garnett money ... but they also get big shiny rings to go with them.|
Through 14 weeks, against the spread:
Favorites vs. spread: 86-115-6
Home teams vs. spread: 105-96-6
Road favorites: 24-43-3
Dogs also winning outright: 84 of 115 (75%)
I feel like I'm the only person over 30 who still watches Christmas specials. When they start showing them in December, I TiVo every one and try to watch them all -- I never feel like it's Christmas until I see the shows, even if I'm slowly getting tired of them. My favorite is "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer." The basic plot: Rudolph is shunned by his peers because of his red nose (even by Santa, who's a racist) and eventually finds his way to the Island of Misfit Toys: A Charlie in the box, a train with square wheels, a boat that sinks, a water gun that only shoots grape jelly, an elephant with polka dots, etc. It warms my heart at the end when Rudolph's nose saves the day and all the misfit toys go to good homes. It's such a nice story and has a great message, even if Santa never enters a sensitivity training program at the end.
Here's my question: in the year 2056, will they still be showing the same shows? What about the year 2112? Should we start making some new ones or some variations of the old ones? I think they should remake the one with Rudolph and the misfit toys and put him on an island with misfit celebrities: K-Fed could be there, Lindsay Lohan, Katie Holmes, Nicole Richie, Paris Hilton, Kate Moss, Michael Richards and Rudolph could turn their lives around, and in the end, they could all find new homes. They could even hire the real celebs to do their own voices. And they could even make the show newsworthy -- like, this year's show could have Kate Bosworth refusing to eat the Gingerbread Man, a love triangle with Rudolph, Paris and Brandon Davis, Michael Richards screaming epithets about Rudolph's nose, and Nicole Richie driving her sled the wrong way and getting arrested. Everything would turn out fine in the end. The best thing would be that they would never run out of misfit celebrities -- there are at least 10 new ones every year. I hope this can happen some day. I'm getting tired of the train with square wheels.
Here are my Week 15 picks: Cowboys -3.5; Vikings -3; Browns +11; Pats -11; Bills -1; Saints -9.5; Steelers (PK); Titans +3.5; Bears -13.5; Giants -5; Lions +5; Cards +3; Chargers -9; Raiders -2; Bengals +3.5.
This week: 1-0 Last week: 9-7 Season: 106-97-6
Home team in caps
Cowboys (-3.5) over FALCONS
Jets (+3) over VIKINGS
RAVENS (-11) over Browns
Texans (+11) over PATS
BILLS (-1) over Dolphins
Redskins (+9.5) over SAINTS
Steelers (PK) over PANTHERS
Jags (-3.5) over TITANS
BEARS (-13.5) over Bucs
Eagles (+5) over GIANTS
Lions (+5) over PACKERS
CARDS (+3) over Broncos
Chiefs (+9) over CHARGERS
RAIDERS (-2) over Rams
Bengals (+3.5) over COLTS
This week: 0-1
Last week: 12-4