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Monday, April 21, 2008
Knicks have lots of great options to fill Isiah's shoes

Page 2

Now that Isiah Thomas has officially been canned (what took so long?) new Knicks prez Donnie Walsh needs to assemble a coaching candidate list. The obvious choices include former NBA coach Rick Carlisle, former Knicks coach Jeff Van Gundy and former Knicks player Mark Jackson.

We here at Page 2 have some other ideas. After all, the Knicks just endured the worst stretch in franchise history. Isn't it time to think a little outside the box?

Larry Brown
Think Larry would want another crack with the Knicks? Probably not.
LARRY BROWN
Pro: Only coach in history to win an NCAA championship and an NBA title

Con: Coached the Knicks to a 23-59 record in 2005-06 -- the same record Isiah led them to this past season

Odds: 10-1

JOHN CALIPARI
Pro: Just coached the University of Memphis to the NCAA championship game; has NBA head-coaching experience

Con: Botched the final couple minutes of the NCAA championship game; 72-112 record during his NBA head-coaching experience

Odds: 25-1

JERRY TARKANIAN
Pro: Known for achieving success despite the most trying of distractions

Con: It's not as difficult to get a national championship ring as you think.

Odds: 34-1

DAVID STERN
Pro: Has demonstrated he cares deeply about the state of the franchise in the past

Con: Can't rig the lottery in the Knicks' favor if he becomes an official Knicks employee

Odds: 50-1

STEPHON MARBURY (Player/Coach)
Pro: Media savvy; gave the greatest interview in NBA history

Con: Thought "dime" and "assist" were different things in said interview

Odds: 75-1

Charles Barkley
Sir Charles probably wouldn't be smiling much if he was running the Knicks.
CHARLES BARKLEY
Pro: One of the most outspoken guys around the NBA; he'll tell the players how it really is

Con: Once he tells them how it really is, the players will probably start weeping

Odds: 100-1

BILL BELICHICK
Pro: Would be ultramotivated by such a new, exciting challenge

Con: Might resign after one day as HC of NYK.

Odds: 300-1

CRAIG T. NELSON
Pro: His character in "Coach" was the respected and successful head coach that Isiah Thomas never was. A few minor script changes could make him knowledgeable about basketball instead of football

Con: Instead of coaching, he might spend every game begging Spike Lee for film work

Odds: 400-1

SIMON COWELL
Pro: A tremendous judge of talent

Con: Not much to judge on the current roster

Odds: 500-1

CHUCK DALY
Pro: Career winning percentage approaching .600 and two championship rings

Con: This makes entirely too much sense

Odds: 500-1

WHOOPI GOLDBERG
Pro: Already led a woeful Knicks team to the playoffs in "Eddie."

Con: Has had about as much career success in the past decade as Isiah Thomas

Odds: 800-1

Spencer Pratt
Maybe Spencer would have some friends if he ran an NBA team?
SPENCER PRATT
Pro: Used to cameras following his every move

Con: As far as we can tell, he's never had a real job, right?

Odds: 1,000-1

LATRELL SPREWELL
Pro: Intensity, competitiveness, link to 1999 Eastern Conference championship team

Con: Difficult to feed family on coach's salary

Odds: 5,000-1.

BRITNEY SPEARS
Pro: Can't be a bigger train wreck than Isiah

Con: On second thought …

Odds: 1,000,000-1