DREAM DATE: HILLARY CLINTON AND BRENDAN SHANAHAN

(BRENDAN)
Yea...

(HILLARY)
Yea...

(BRENDAN)
You want to, uh, discuss it?

(HILLARY)
Not particularly.

(BRENDAN)
OK, we can discuss something else.

(HILLARY)
Sure!

(BRENDAN)
You seen anything good on the Internet lately?

(HILLARY)
Naw. Well, the Spurs re-enacting musical theater, I suppose. (Ed's note: See above, in WATU!)

(BRENDAN)
Seen this will.i.am Obama video? That thing is amaz ---

(HILLARY)
(glaring) No.

(BRENDAN)
Oh, yea. Right. So...

(HILLARY)
Yea... Honestly, though, a five-goal lead? To the CANADIENS?

(BRENDAN)
You're one to talk! Nine states in a row? To a guy who was in the State House less than a decade ago?

(HILLARY)
He has momentum!

(BRENDAN)
They had Kovalvev!

(HILLARY)
He's an impassioned orator!

(BRENDAN)
They play in a city that cares about nothing else!

(HILLARY)
(sighs) This is depressing.

(BRENDAN)
You're telling me. (pause) Yo, are you even from New York?

(HILLARY)
Shut up.