YOUR 8 A.M.

QUESTIONS WE WON'T GET TO ASK TODAY:
Houston Rockets:
We're happy for you and all, but do you realize that the two streaks of roughly this length last season were by teams bounced in the first (Dallas) and second (Phoenix) round of the playoffs?
Antoine Walker:
Think there's any shot at royalties off "Client No. 9" for "Employee No. 8?"
Dwyane Wade:
At least you have love in your life , right?

ODDITITES:
Odds on...Arizona hoops coach Kevin O'Neill's inner monologue today:
(7 to 1) "Yes, it is...great...that Lute wants to return. Yes, that's it. And his announcement...couldn't have come...at a better time. I mean, wtf, I'm only trying to secure an at-large bid here. Do we really need to see three more years of that bull---- zone defense? Three more years of early outs in the tournament? Twenty-two-win seasons! Second-round knockouts! Goodbye, Arizona! But don't stop hailing, Lute! Never! That little gray-haired weasel. Love him like they'll never love me."
(3 to 1) "Hold that smile."
(Even) "Hold it!"

SCREW THE MATH:
Julius Jones' four-year, $12 million contract could buy him one Kodak EASYSHARE C763 digital camera ($129.95). With that, he and fellow running back T.J. Duckett could take 585,931 pictures together and then frame each one in 6-by-10-inch picture frames ($20.48 per frame) from the good people at Daniel Smith art supplies in Seattle. Jones and Duckett could then drive to Shaun Alexander's house--assuming they don't need to buy gas--and at his doorstep spread out all the pictures to show Alexander what he is no longer in.

OVERHEARD:
Two men on a subway car.

"You hear Trent Green is back?"
"Really? With who?"
"Rams."
"Behind Bulger?"
"Yep."
"Why do I get the feeling this isn't going to end well?"

WORD OF THE DAY: Intrinsicality
Think you know why? Give us a shout at Editor.ESPNMag@GMail.Com. We might just make it worth your while today.

TODAY ON THE SITE
We got some new reports from Grapefruit and Cactus Leagues dropping, a slew of new WATUs, some 10th Anniversary [Ed's note: The party is tomorrow/Third Eye Blind rocking out with us!] video content, an Open Letter to the Black Mamba and a brand-new Charticle. In "Lunch Links," we'll be including a special section of videos from great Championship Week Moments throughout history. Stick around!

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