THE WORLD'S GAME ... ACCORDING TO US

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"Kobe loves me."

If we learned anything from the men's Olympic soccer tournament, besides the fact that it's too hot to play at noon in midsummer Beijing and that Ronaldinho is still a bit tubby, it's that Kobe Bryant, the huge global superstar, is a big fan of Lionel Messi, the tiny global superstar. Bryant attended Argentina matches and was quoted saying that Messi was his favorite player. He also reportedly found the shaggy, little 21-year old in the lunchroom and, like an autograph-seeker, told him in Spanish, "Messi, eres el mejor." You are the best!

A few days later, Messi gave Bryant his jersey and told one newspaper, "He came to watch the game. He waved at me from the stands…Kobe showed that he is seriously great." So, Kobe is seriously great for watching Messi, and Messi is seriously great for being watched. Que especial!

This got us thinking about famous soccer fans. It turns out that Bryant has a soft spot, not just for Messi, but for F.C. Barcelona in general. We'd like to imagine Bryant wearing a Barca jersey in the Olympic lunchroom, being called out by fellow gold medalist Rafael Nadal, proud supporter of Real Madrid, for a celebrity fan Madrid-Barcelona rumble. Nadal could have flown in other famous Madridistas, Antonio Banderas and Julio Iglesias (Iglesias played keeper on a Real Madrid youth team). Bryant would have to rely on Barca fan Drew Carey to get his back. (We guess we'd take Carey over Iglesias if we had to pick.)

It's a funny image considering the history of these two teams. Real Madrid's most famous fan has to be Generalissimo Franco. Once upon a time, supporting Barcelona meant siding with the Catalan separatists against Franco's fascist government. The Nou Camp, Barcelona's stadium, was the only place where fans felt safe speaking the Catalan language. Barca liked to boast that it was "more than a club." It was a political movement.

These days, though, it's hard to tell what fandom means. Spanish Prime Minister José Luis Rodríguez Zapatero is a Barcelona fan, even though he's from the Castilian city of Valladolid. Like Kobe, he's a self-made supporter. It's actually gotten Zapatero into a bit of trouble with his own faithful in Madrid (He was booed when he boasted that Barca would win the Champions League), but it's not political suicide. Spain isn't what it used to be.

In England, fandom can be equally arbitrary and widespread. Just take the celebrity-favorite, Arsenal. In addition to obvious supporters like Nick Hornby, who wrote Fever Pitch, a book about his Arsenal obsession, the unofficial Gunners fan club yokes together such figures as Sarah Michelle Gellar and Johnny Rotten, Jackie Chan and Steve Earle, Michael Moore and Osama bin Laden. That's right. Lefty filmmaker Michael Moore is supposedly a Goner!

As for the most wanted man in the world, according to biographer Adam Robinson, bin Laden attended an Arsenal match back in 1994 and even bought his kids some Gunners gear. (After learning about this, club officials officially barred him from the stadium.) Perhaps, bin Laden was drawn to Arsenal in opposition to their archrival Tottenham Hotspur and its prominent fan, Salman Rushdie, hated by Islamic extremists for his novel, The Satanic Verses.

Or maybe bin Laden was turned off by some other Spurs celeb fan. Ray Liotta and Steve Nash are both possibilities. But if we had to point fingers, they'd be pointing in Phil Collins' direction. "Sussudio" is enough to justify anyone—even "The Evil One"—going Arsenal-mad.

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