THE MORNING ACCORDING TO US

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A cat married to a Seal. Whatever.

A man in London dressed up as a rabbit today to run a half marathon. He didn't do it for charity, or because everyone else dressed up as crickets or squirrels. No, John Muriithi, a 21-year-old from Kenya, put on a rabbit head because he was paid to do it, and because he thought it'd be fun to compete against the best distance runners from the U.K. dressed as a bit player from Donnie Darko. Muriithi won the race, of course. And all we could think of was, How refreshing. Finally an athlete wearing a uniform that foreshadows his performance.

Imagine if other athletes did that. Like, what sort of outfit would they wea if that outfit could in some way indicate their on-field play? And how much, like Muriithi, would they be paid to wear it?

Matt Cassell would naturally throw on the old Chatsworth High helmet, since he's seemingly a few snaps removed and just growing out of his status as an 18-year-old quarterback. Belichick wouldn't mind that either, because at least then Cassell would look like the quarterback he drafted. It wouldn't cost Chatsworth High much to put him in that helmet, given Cassell's play. We're thinking nothing more than the promise to take the homecoming queen to the dance afterward.

Carlos Zambrano, for every start next year, would dress like one of the old Times Square peep show dancers, to remind Cubs fans how much of a tease he is. And the cost? As is the Cubs tendency these days, they'd overpay so it mirrored his ERA prior to the start.

Because he's saving the Dodgers, and because he thinks so highly of himselef, Manny Ramirez would dress like Jesus for Game 4. And, in a case of Manny being Manny, he'd see how much those sandals could fetch on eBay.

Perhaps it could be something beautiful, the sports equivalent of Alice in Wonderland. Or not.

Elsewhere…

Well, at least the future of rowing sports is safe. A canoeing star's eggs were frozen for babies after the 2012 Olympics.

Counting cards: A New York collection of cards includes a somewhat astonishing 6,356 decks.

Joey Chestnut adds a pizza-eating title to his mantle. The reigning king of hot dogs is gaining a diverse portfolio.

A blind Belgian fires up the engine, and drives at 192 miles per hour. How this is different than 80% of NYC cabbies, we're not sure.

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