Auction Block: Any Given Tuesday

Athletes turned politicians leave a few toys behind.

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"Franken? I think Jack Handy has a better platform."

[Ed's note: If this interests you, you should also read this.]

We expect our politicians to represent us when they take office. Not just in the literal sense in which a congressman is a stand-in for his district, or a President speaks the will of his nation, but also in the metaphorical sense. We want the actual person to at least pay some lip service to the notion that he shares our likes and dislikes, including our passion for sports. (And they often do.)

When a governor winds up to throw out the first pitch at a major league baseball game, we don't want to see the ball bounce before it crosses home plate. It's probably better if he or she throws heat into the dugout like Ricky Vaughn than display a noodle arm.

Hockey Moms, NASCAR Dads, Jai-Alai Great Uncles—they all want a little ounce of jock in their President. George W. Bush owned an MLB team. JFK played touch football. William Henry Harrison paddled a tippy canoe. George Washington threw a rock across the Delaware that killed Benedict Arnold. It's all true. Most of it.

Despite his ill-gotten reputation as a klutz, Gerald Ford held the finest sports pedigree of any commander-in-chief, having played both ways as a center and a linebacker for Michigan. His teams won a pair of national titles. "Jerry was one guy who would stay and fight in a losing cause," said an assistant coach.

When we went looking for some evidence of President Ford's own ideas on athletic greatness and why it meshes so well with national politics, we turned to the 38th President's official library in Ann Arbor. Archivist Christian Goos transcribed some handwritten notes that were used in the former President's 1979 memoir A Time to Heal.

"Playing to win does mean you must organize and train, whether it be in an athletic contest or a political fray. This means you are building not only for the present but for the future. Winning gives you that certain satisfaction, but there is also the reward that in preparing and competing, day after day you are building something that in the end will pay dividends," wrote Ford.

And, for the loser of tomorrow's contest, some positive thoughts: "The disappointment should not drown the spirit, rattle one's composure, sidetrack a well organized plan or preclude another effort." Of course, the only time Ford actually ran for President, he lost to Jimmy Carter, so take that one with a grain of salt.

Collectibles to help you Rock N' Jock the vote:

Arnold Schwarzenegger Mr. Universe Poster:
If it were possible to prop up failing banks with pure muscle power, we'd write the Governator in, regardless of his Austrian origins.

Heath Shuler Redskins Jersey:
As the Representative from North Carolina's 11th district, the former Vol is part of the Blue Dog Coalition. He's still tough to figure.

Jim Ryun Sports Illustrated:
The long-time congressman from Kansas ran a sub-four-minute mile while still in high school. This magazine cover is from 1966, when Ryun was named "Sportsman of the Year" at age 19.

Bill Bradley Knicks 1972 Topps Card:
Basketball Hall of Famer, Rhodes Scholar, Senator, and Presidential candidate. Who needs him more—the country, or the Knicks?

Jack Kemp Tumbler:
Try out our new tongue twister: Jack Kent Cooke took Jack Kemp's Cup. As a Buffalo Bill and a Bob Dole running mate, Kemp was a brilliant runner-up.

Steve Largent signed Seahawks Football:
Largent was lightly regarded coming out of Tulsa in 1976, but the sure-handed receiver caught 100 TDs in his career out west. He served his home state of Oklahoma in the House before an unsuccessful run for Governor ended his political career.

Tom Osborne Retirement Banner:
The legendary Nebraska coach took his conservative style to the House in 2000. He somehow failed to win the Republican nomination for Governor of Nebraska in '06 despite being worshipped as a god in his home state.

Lynn Swann autographed photo:
Swann ran for Governor of Pennsylvania in 2006, and lost. He abandoned his run for the Senate in 2008. So his stint as Chairman of the President's Council on Physical Fitness will have to do. Damn, he was one great football player, though, wasn't he?

Jesse Ventura XFL Football:
Two crazy ideas that taste crazy together.

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Don't forget to exercise your franchise tomorrow. Let us know what you have your eye on at collectespn@gmail.com

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