A 2009 American League preview: Viral Video Style

Ever wonder which AL club would best represent "David After Dentist?" We are here for you with the previews. And the videos.

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What does Seth MacFarlane have to do with the AL West race? Quite a bit, actually.

From The Hampster Dance to The Farting Preacher, there's nothing quite like a good Internet fad to get you through your work day. But did you know that the most popular 'Net fads of all time share similar qualities with baseball teams? (At least, that's the excuse we're making to link to our favorite videos.) So let's preview the upcoming MLB season by going team-by-team and looking at their fad comparisons. Here now: the American League.

THE AL EAST

The Blue Jays: David After Dentist
Like the youngster in the video, the Blue Jays are left in a daze—through no fault of their own. Playing in the toughest division in baseball will do that. Unfortunately for the team, that feeling is going to last a lot longer than young David's drug trip, meaning Jays fans will be experiencing more pain than the poor soul whose dentist has misplaced the Novocain.

The Orioles: "Tranquilized Bear Hits Trampoline"
The Orioles are stuck in a place they'd rather not be, and in desperate need of some assistance. While it's going to get a lot worse before it gets any better, there's a trampoline in place to make the fall a little less painful, and that trampoline's name is Matt Wieters.

The Rays: "Prison Thriller"
The result of unparalleled scouting and planning, the current state of the Rays franchise—productive veterans, youngsters heading into their peak years, a collection of talented farm hands waiting on deck—is the envy of the rest of the league. But no matter how well choreographed the performance is, there's a tenseness hanging in the air. In the video, it's the threat of a prison riot. With the Rays, it's the result of playing in the same division as the Red Sox and Yankees.

The Red Sox: "Where The Hell is Matt?"
The two most perfect representations of the power of their respective mediums, both the video and the Red Sox are only able to have such success because of the amount of money they have to burn. In Matt's case, Stride Gum funded the trip. In the Red Sox's case, they have a devoted fan base with a lot of disposable income. But you can't fault either of them for using money wisely, a reason the Red Sox will once again be in contention this season.

The Yankees: "The Battle at Kruger"
One of the great nature videos of all time, at one point there are perhaps fifty animals on screen all vying for the life of one precious buffalo. But like the Yankees throwing money at their problems, more weapons does not always mean the job gets done. There's a good chance that at the end of this year, all the team will have is more mouths to feed and no championships to feed them with.

THE AL CENTRAL

The Indians: "Afro Ninja"
Look at their team—Cliff Lee, Grady Sizemore, Fausto Carmona—and the talent level is there for the possibility of a dangerous team. But one false step—say, an injury to any of those three—and the whole thing could hilariously blow up in their face mid-back flip.

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"Evolution of Dance? To 'ell with you."

The Royals: "Sneezing Panda"
Like the soft and cuddly panda, no one watches the Royals for anything more than a source of amusement. But be warned. If you fail to respect the panda for what it is (a fierce creature of the wild) you run the risk of getting mauled. Just like those taking the Royals lightly this year, especially while they're playing in a division where everyone is a contender.

The Tigers: "Techno Viking"
Laughable under the circumstances—a last place finish after a preseason expectation that they'll plate 1,000 runs will do that—teams are better off guffawing in private. Like the Techno Viking, you don't want to get into a fight with the Tigers lineup. There's still plenty of firepower left in there.

The Twins: "Chocolate Rain"
Both are tough to take seriously because of their awkward presentations (for the Twins, that's playing in the Baggydome), but once you focus on the actual content, there's enough talent in place for either of them to be a huge success story.

The White Sox: "Evolution of Dance"
From swiping Carlos Quentin, to the strange signing of Bartolo Colon to take over a rotation spot, to the daily snippets of hilarity from Ozzie Guillen's mouth, there's a lot going on in the south side of Chicago. But when you step back and look through all of the chaos, isn't it just basically running in place?

THE AL WEST

The Angels: "Daft Hands"
A great accomplishment no doubt, there's just something kind of&boring about the "Daft Hands" video. In the same way, while the talent level and payroll capabilities are there, if you're an Angels fan you have to start wondering if the team is ever going to transcend, or if they're just going to continue having very good—but never great—seasons.

The A's: "Numa Numa"
While stuck in a state of arrested development due to their payroll inflexibility—just as the Numa Numa guy is stuck in place due to the small framing of his webcam—the A's are just kind of happy to be part of the conversation this year. Which, in turn, makes them increasingly dangerous.

The Mariners: "Miss South Carolina"
Obviously out of their league from day one, the team keeps trying every possible method they know of answering the question of how to get to October, either through trades (Erik Bedard) or free agency (Adrian Beltre, Carlos Silva), but by the end, all they're left with is a bunch of false starts and nonsense, and all we're left with is feeling increasingly uncomfortable.

The Rangers: "Lois Jumps Peter"
The team is an exercise in futility that gets increasingly frustrating for those on the inside, and increasingly hilarious to those on the outside watching.

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