Early Season Hot Fire Alert: Emilio Bonifacio

You know the Marlins can get the first team sweep of 2009 on April 8? It has a lot to do with this guy.

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Ever hear of the six-year theory?

One of our favorite people in the world is from Miami. Sitting at a watering hole with her a few days ago, we floated the completely asinine "Marlins Six-Year Gap Theory." You ever hear it? It goes like this: 1997, 2003, … You ever do "pattern exercises" in math? What would come next? That's right: 2009. It's 2009 now, and guess what? The Marlins are about to drop the first sweep of the early season. A major reason: Emilio Bonifacio. On Opening Day, this dude hits an inside-the-park HR; the last guy to do that was Yaz. When a reporter told Bonifacio that, he says, "Who's Yaz?" As Peter Griffin says in this clip, "So cute."

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