ESPNTheMag.Com Presents: All-World Power Rankings

What's the funniest horse name ever?

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"Hoof hearted?"

FUNNIEST HORSE NAME EVER? "HOOF HEARTED."

What is All-World Power Rankings?

Kentucky Derby is on Saturday. Fun. Best part of it: seeing Hugh Hefner roll up with three girls who would never even look in your general direction at a bar, all wearing funny pink hats, and silently sobbing to yourself. Wait, did we say best part? It's been a confusing few days (years). Horse racing is awesome, though; some call it the "sport of kings." We're partial to flip cup for that title, but we see the argument. One thing we love about horses running in mud: their names are often very funny. Here's an attempt at making a list of the funniest we've ever seen. One thing, though. Sometimes, sexually-charged things are funny, but Disney signs our checks, so we're not including those. Hopefully that makes sense to ya. If you have other name suggestions, holla.

TOP 5
RANK (YESTERDAY)		WHAT	WHY
	1 (145)	HOOF HEARTED	Watch this video. LOL, yo!
	2 (102)	OH NO, IT'S MY MOTHER-IN-LAW	We're nowhere close to having a mother-in-law. (Depressingly, though, we are the only guy in our area of the office sans girlfriend.) Still, we can appreciate this video. Amazing.
	3 (84)	DOREMIFASOLLATIDO	Here's the clip. Tom Durkin: great horse announcer. Seriously, watch that. It's crazy funny.
	4 (71)	NO FAT CHICKS	We don't condone this attitude, but admit: you laughed a little when you read it.
	5 (920)	REALLY FAST HORSE	Hmmm. Direct. We like that. This is a good list.

HONORABLE MENTION
RANK (YESTERDAY)		WHAT	WHY
	12 (404)	SHE'S EASY	Again, we don't condone this. But the announcer call would be funny. "Down the stretch…I can't believe it…she's easy!" Unfortunately, we lack video of a moment such as that actually happening.
	28 (99)	ARRRRR	Watch this. Incredible.

RISING AND FALLING
MOVEMENT		WHAT
		HOLD ME BACK (Reminds us of the Three Stooges, which is fun.)
		ONE WAY TICKET TO THE GLUE FACTORY (Seems a little mean-spirited, no?)

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