ESPN Golf

Can you believe this magical time of the year is here already? Every fall I promise myself I won't let it sneak up on me and then, without fail, I'm completely unprepared when it arrives. Yes, it's Silly Season, that bizarre two-month period between the PGA Tour's last official tournament and the beginning of the 2008 season at Kapalua.

Unlike other sports, when the offseason is a time to rest and get healthier, in golf it's a time to travel and, well, get wealthier. Enter Fred Couples, the Punxsutawney Phil of the golf world. He last emerged in April for the Masters, saw his shadow and announced there were at least six more months till the Skins Game. And now, after having competed just twice in 2007, he's committed to playing in three events between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

What better icon than Freddie himself to guide us through the maze of Silly Season events and help us rate, on a scale of one to five "Freddies," which of these events really is the silliest.

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PGA TOUR QUALIFYING TOURNAMENT
Dates: Nov. 28-Dec. 3

So unsilly it borders on the depressing. No appearance fees, no lavish gift bag waiting in the hotel room, just a bunch of guys trying to earn a spot on tour and show their families that they haven't wasted the past 20 years of their lives. Talk about Bah Humbug. Thankfully, it's usually around this point that a player gets nervous and starts throwing up in between shots, and in doing so single-handedly saves the tournament and Silly Season from irreversible seriousness.

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THE LEXUS CUP
Dates: Dec. 7-9

In only its third year, the event pits the top women golfers from Asia against the top women from the rest of the world. Nothing silly about that. Wait, the Americans are lumped into an "International" team? Hmmm, Paul Azinger just had an idea...

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WENDY'S 3-TOUR CHALLENGE
Dates: Nov. 12-13 (airing Dec. 23)

This one's already in the books. But in appropriate Silly Season fashion, the PGA Tour's own Web site has no record of what actually happened. This either means it was too boring to share with the public or the men from the PGA and Champions Tour teams got trounced by the ladies from the LPGA.

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TARGET WORLD CHALLENGE
Dates: Dec. 13-16

At first glance, it's the least silly of them all. The strongest field of the season at a legit venue. It's the one offseason tournament where it usually feels like players want to win -- and not just for the money. After all, this is "Tiger's Tournament." How often does a player get the opportunity to win the No. 1 player's own event? OK, sure, Tiger also hosts the AT&T Classic in July. And come to think of it, he's also the guy behind the Deutsche Bank Championship on Labor Day weekend. Add in Freddie's attendance, and this thing's starting to look a little sillier every year.

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DEL WEBB FATHER-SON CHALLENGE
Dates: Nov. 29-Dec. 2

On paper this has all the makings of a perfect Silly Season event. Thin galleries, a forgettable course and a bizarre field that includes both big-name players like Vijay Singh and guys like Billy Casper that you weren't sure were still alive. And yet I always feel creepy watching this one. Maybe it's because the idea for this undoubtedly came from a sports producer who figured he could lure famous players back onto the course by inviting their sons to come, too. Or maybe I just find it depressing that Davis and Dru Love's fourth-place finish last year tied Davis' best finish on tour in 2007.

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LG SKINS GAME
Dates: Nov. 24-25

For 24 years, the Skins Game has been the torchbearer of silliness. But unless Woody Austin crawls out of a lake and makes this year's foursome a fivesome, I worry that this Thanksgiving tradition might be lumped in with my Uncle Sid's heartburn as something everyone knows is going on but doesn't care to watch.

Outside of Couples, rounding out the group are Zach Johnson, Brett Wetterich and defending champ Stephen Ames. I'll pause while you yawn. Since the biggest Skins Game moment in recent history was Fred Funk's playing a hole while wearing a pink skirt, let's hope one of these guys brings something silky besides his swing.

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MERRILL LYNCH SHOOTOUT
Dates: Dec. 7-9

Greg Norman has a history of pairing up friends in his always-fun two-man team event, which is why I'm still trying to figure out the connection between defending champs Rod Pampling and Jerry Kelly. I'm not sure matching goatees is enough to build a friendship on, but I'm willing to be wrong.

And thanks to Norman, I now have my favorite team of the entire Silly Season -- Fred Funk and Jeff Sluman. Or, as they're referred to in the press release, the "diminutive twosome." Try to get away with that during the regular season. No word on who will be filling ousted Merrill Lynch CEO Stan O'Neal's spot in the Tuesday pro-am, but here's betting O'Neal is playing golf somewhere.

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ADT SKILLS CHALLENGE
Dates: Nov. 5 (airing Dec. 29)

Any event that pairs a top pro golfer with a beloved athlete is off to a perfectly silly start, especially when one of the teams, Greg Norman and Roger Clemens, doesn't even fit the description.

It also features the most egregious product placement of the year; the eight team challenges are corporatized with such unavoidable monikers as the (I'm not making this up) "Dunkin' Donuts Putting Challenge" and "Transamerica Chip Shot."

But the silliest part of all is that despite its having already taken place nearly two weeks ago, NBC won't air it until Dec. 29. Perhaps the idea is to wait so long that some of the gallery from the event will tune in just to remember who they saw win.

With so much silliness, could anything possibly keep this tournament from receiving the unprecedented five "Freddies"? Just the fact that Freddie himself wasn't there. But hey, it's Silly Season. Time to be generous.

Bob Smiley is a TV writer and contributor to ESPN.com's golf coverage. He also writes the golf blog Fore Right and can be reached at Bobsmiley77@gmail.com.