Rotten apples found in Bottom 10

Originally Published: November 3, 2010
By Mark Schlabach |

WEEK: Preseason | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13

The Bottom 10 inspirational thought of the week:

"Load up on guns and bring your friends
It's fun to lose and to pretend
She's over-bored and self-assured
Oh no, I know a dirty word

Hello, hello, hello, how low?
Hello, hello, hello, how low?
Hello, hello, hello, how low?
Hello, hello, hello

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us."

-- "Smells Like Teen Spirit," Nirvana

Remember when Washington gave us its so-called "Seattle Sound," which spawned grunge acts like Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Alice in Chains and later the Foo Fighters?

Two decades later, the Apple State is giving us really bad football.

Entering the final month of the 2010 season, Washington and Washington State are holding up the bottom of the Pac-10 standings. Last week, the Cougars and Huskies lost games against Arizona State and Stanford, respectively, by a combined score of 83-0.

Now the Cougars and Huskies share the not-so-coveted No. 5 spot in the Bottom 10. For Bottom 10 novices, the No. 5 spot goes to a team (or teams) that isn't necessarily one of the worst in the country, but embarrassed itself by performing well below its potential the previous week.

Washington State, which has become a mainstay in the Bottom 10, has embarrassed itself all season. The Cougars' only victory came against FCS foe Montana State 23-22 on Sept. 11 and they've lost 23 of their last 24 Pac-10 games.

Washington came into the season with high hopes after quarterback Jake Locker passed on the NFL draft and returned to school. But Locker has been hobbled by injuries, and the Huskies have lost three of their last four games. Locker will miss Saturday's game at No. 1 Oregon, and Washington will have to win three of its last four games to play in a bowl game.

With apologies to Eddie Vedder and Steve Harvey, here's this week's Bottom 10:'s Bottom 10
1. Akron 0-9 "Ten [Pearl Jam]:" Pearl Jam's debut album in 1991; the Zips can become the first FBS team to lose 10 games if they fall in Saturday's Pillow Fight of the Week at Ball State.
2. New Mexico 0-8 "Black Hole Sun [Soundgarden]:" Lobos coach Mike Locksley needs to wash away the pain (not rain) after his team lost at Colorado State, 38-14.
3. Western Kentucky 1-7 "Over Now [Alice in Chains]:" After losing 26 games in a row, the Hilltoppers' winning streak lasted one week after losing to North Texas, 33-6.
4. Eastern Michigan 1-8 "Learn to Fly [Foo Fighters]:" Like the Foo Fighters, Eagles coach Ron English is looking for a sign of life after his team was walloped by Toledo, 42-7.
5. Washington/Washington State 4-13 "Alive [Pearl Jam]:" College football fans in the Apple State are checking their teams for a pulse after the Cougars and Huskies lost last week's games by a combined score of 83-0.
6. UNLV 1-7 "Come As You Are [Nirvana]:" Thankfully, the Rebels don't have a gun after they were routed by TCU 48-6 last week.
7. San Jose State 1-8 "Pretty Noose [Soundgarden]:" The Spartans probably wanted to hang themselves after giving up the winning touchdown on the final play of a 29-27 loss to New Mexico State in last week's Pillow Fight of the Week.
8. Memphis 1-7 "Daughter [Pearl Jam]:" The Tigers will no longer be Tennessee's little sisters if they can upset the Volunteers at the Liberty Bowl on Saturday night.
9. Ball State 2-7 "Check My Brain [Alice in Chains]:" The Cardinals had four more turnovers in last week's 33-14 loss at Kent State, giving them 23 this season, tied for second-worst in the country.
10. Minnesota 1-8 "Lithium [Nirvana]:" The Gophers' defense cracked in last week's 52-10 loss to Ohio State, allowing 507 yards of offense.

Waiting list: Duke (2-6), Wake Forest (2-6), Clemson's offense, Kansas (2-6), West Virginia's fumbles, Rice (2-6), Bowling Green (2-7), Missouri's first quarter, Michigan State's first half, Buffalo (2-6), late Illini TD passes, Central Michigan (2-7), "zero tolerance" at Michigan State, Wyoming (2-7), Tennessee (2-6), choking on the Georgia sideline, Vanderbilt (2-6), North Texas (2-6), Miami's interceptions, New Mexico State (2-6), Utah State (2-6), Louisiana-Lafayette (2-6), Marshall (2-6)

Mark Schlabach covers college football for

Mark Schlabach | email

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